Momming ain’t easy and throwing a career into the mix adds a little extra something special. There are for sure days where I think to myself “is all this craziness worth it?” Usually it happens when I’m stuck in traffic, I’m already ten minutes late picking my son up from practice, I know I still have to get home and cook dinner, pack for a trip that leaves the next morning at nine and I’m pretty sure I won’t make it to the dry cleaners in time to pick up suits I desperately need to take with me. That’s when I usually have a mini break-down. Cue the tears. And the second-guessing. Am I doing the right thing?
Then I have moments where the answer to that question is a resounding YES!
My most recent affirmation happened in the bathroom—proving yet again that divine inspiration can happen anywhere.
I am a financial advisor which means that during advisor conferences I’m pretty much a lone wolf. Most studies put the percentage of female financial advisors in the industry somewhere between 15-25%. The silver lining is that there is never a line for the women’s room. Which is actually a sad and pathetic silver lining. As if I don’t know I’m one of the only women in the room most times, I’m always reminded during breaks because being in the women’s bathroom feels like Siberia. Sad, lonely and isolated. It actually gives a chance for that little voice of doubt to whisper in my ear: “Do you really belong here?”
But mostly I am used to it by now. Until last week when I was reminded that I didn’t have to be. Used to it, that is.
I was at an industry conference, one that is focused specifically on financial advisors who manage retirement plans for corporations, non-profits, and municipalities. I’m on the leadership committee and we have been focused on encouraging more diversity in terms of age, gender and ethnicity. I enjoy the work I do on the committee because I do truly feel like I’m at least trying to make a difference. But it is more work piled on top of an already full plate. Hard but fulfilling. But sometimes all the hard work actually pays off. And that is what happened in the women’s room. I was in the bathroom waiting in line when a friend of mine said what I had been thinking, “Can you believe there is an actual line for the women’s room?” Another woman waiting in line chimed in, “You just said what all of us were thinking!” Then we all laughed and got excited that yes in fact this was an actual freaking line in the women’s room! So we did what any bunch of women giddy with empowerment would do, we took a selfie. Like we were sixteen-years-old or a bunch of Kardashians. And it felt awesome!
We were all thrilled because each of us had been the lonely woman in the bathroom. We had all felt the isolation of being one of the few. But now we had reached a critical mass and were witnessing a tipping point. We had kept showing up, doing our jobs, and hoping that one day our example would lead other women to believe they had a place in this field. And that day was last week. We were shown our time is now. Our efforts were in fact all worth it.
For laughter and inspiration read my book The Working Mommy's Manual, available on Amazon.
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